The critical inner voice tends to be louder and meaner in some of us than others, and it tends to pick on us more or less at different points in our lives. And the scary part is the demon is your own voice.” It tells you that you are fat and ugly and you don’t deserve love.
You are six or twelve or fifteen and you look in the mirror and you hear a voice so awful and mean that it takes your breath away. In her book Yes, Please comedian Amy Poehler described this inner enemy as “a demon voice.” She wrote, “This very patient and determined demon shows up in your bedroom one day and refuses to leave. This “critical inner voice” exists in all of us, reminding us constantly that we aren’t good enough and don’t deserve what we want. The way we perceive ourselves as an outcast, rejected, disliked, or cast aside has much less to do with our external circumstances and everything to do with an internal critic we all possess. Moreover, what most of us who feel this sense of isolation also fail to realize is that the reason behind it. So, while we may feel alone in thinking “nobody likes me,” we actually have that in common with a staggering number of people in the world. study of millions of people found that one in 10 people didn’t feel they had a close friend, while one in five never or rarely felt loved. Human beings are a social species, and yet, every one of us feels, on some level, like we just don’t fit in with everyone else.Ī recent U.K. When psychologist Lisa Firestone conducted research using a scale that measured individual’s self-destructive thoughts, she found the most common critical thought people had toward themselves was that they are not like other people. And yet, this exact thought is extremely common to shy people and extroverts alike. This feeling has almost no bearing in reality and no purpose other than to deeply wound us and turn us against ourselves and whatever our goals may be.
There is perhaps no more painful thought in the world than that of “nobody likes me.” It’s an easy feeling to indulge and dwell on, a terrible go-to self-attack in low moments when we feel isolated, depressed, anxious or insecure.
Critical Inner Voice, Isolation and Loneliness, Self Development, Self-Destructive Behavior
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